The San An Worker Food Chain

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Evolution is an amazing thing. They came to the White Isle in the 60’s, mostly by mistake – some stayed and some left and it’s been happening every year ever since.  Here is a light-hearted look at the San Antonio Worker over the ages and their place in modern day Ibiza.


HIPPIES – 40 years plus on the island. Came to Ibiza to discover themselves and never left. Still wear lots of denim and speak like Keith Richards, smoke spliffs and/or ducados (local cigs).
Most likely to say: Brigitte Bardot; now there was a woman!
Least likely to say: That new road is a great addition to the islands transport infrastructure

DINOSAURS – 30 years plus on the island. Love to talk about the late 70 and 80’s with a nostalgic tear in their eye, name-dropping the Gibb brothers, Ku and Club Tropicana into every conversation, lamenting the “good old days”. Tony Pike is their hero.
Most likely to say: Forcing the clubs to cover their terraces was the beginning of the end
Least likely to say: Ibiza is so much better now than it used to be

VETERANS – 20 years plus. Usually ex-reps and bar managers. The 90s is their favourite topic and they discuss the Rave/BritPop era as if it was their own. Not quite as bitter as the Dinosaurs but on the verge of becoming one (although they would never admit it).
Most likely to say: Manumission, Carry On at Space and then Bora Bora…the party never used to end…
Least likely to say: The lack of air-con never bothered us back then…..

KNOW IT ALLS – 10 years plus. They encompass the noughties and still perceive themselves to be down with the kids. Too old to be part of the in-crowd, too young to be a veteran, they know everything that you did or didn’t want to know about the island and will lecture you at any given moment.
Most likely to say: What time’s John Digweed playing?
Least likely to say: Atlantis? I’m not sure I know how to get there by road

SERIOUS ONES – 5 years plus. They’ve seen it all and know it all but haven’t yet found their way out of San Antonio. They look at the Know it All’s with envy, the Veterans with disdain and sneer at the Dinosaurs.
Most likely to say: Let’s meet out of town for tapas at Tapas.
Least likely to say: Let’s meet out of town for tapas in San Carlos

WANNABES – 2 years plus.  Busy trying to make a name for themselves and desperate to be taken seriously by the Serious Ones. Usually found behind a bar or on the door of a club telling all the Returning Workers what it was like ‘back in the day’. They can’t even bring themselves to talk to 1st Year Workers.
Most likely to say: Marco Carola is God
Least likely to say: David Guetta is God.

RETURNING WORKER – 1 year plus. King of the world because they made every mistake in the book and not only lived to tell the tale but came back for more. They take advantage of 1st Year Workers and drop C-list names into conversation even though they don’t know or have never met them. Steer clear.
Most likely to say: I can take you to the airport for €20.
Least likely to say: No I haven’t got a taxi licence, my car isn’t insured and I’m still buzzing from Sankey’s last night

1st YEAR WORKER – 1 month plus. Achingly trendy with no apparent desire to work but usually has a first class degree in blagging. Likes to act like a Returning Worker but doesn’t have the knowledge so looks stupid especially in front of the Wannabes.
Most likely to say: …then we watched the sunrise down at Mambo.
Least likely to say: A packet of disposable razors please shopkeeper.

1st YEAR WORKER – 1 week plus. A clueless individual who arrives with a dream that turns into a nightmare within 10 days. Will be ripped off by a Returning Worker then have wallet/iPhone/passport stolen whilst dropping first ever pill.  Will call mummy in tears begging her to book a return flight asap.
Most likely to say: I’m living the dream.
Least likely to say: I’m having a nightmare.

1st YEAR WORKER – wannabe dealer. Lowest rung on the worker food chain. Talks big, promises lots but always lets everyone down. Mentions Peru with a knowing smirk, usually has scabby skin and a pocket full of 5 euro notes. Do not approach this person under any circumstances.
Most likely to say: mandy…charlie…pills…ket?
Least likely to say:…all of which I regularly take too much of

San Antonio Workers – A Short History

  

 This coming Friday 17 July is the annual ‘SH1T Party’ that takes place at Fantasyland, home of the Zoo Project and will see well over 1000 summer transients party through the day and night. This infamous island party was started by the San Antonio workers so what exactly is a “worker”…….

The term ‘worker’ usually implies that you have a job and do some work however as you may already be aware normal rules don’t apply in Ibiza and definitely not in San Antonio. Back in the 90s there were only a handful of workers mainly in the West End PRing outside bars and selling the odd substance to get by. There were no season passes to clubs but there was the numbered ‘Space tag’ – allowing free entry into the worlds best club – the holy grail for all workers! Holiday reps ruled the roost as they controlled tourists and tourists meant bar crawls and bar crawls meant money. Bar owners fussed over Holiday Reps who in turn sneered at workers. 

Ibiza in those days was (and still is) a mythical place: No internet, no mobile phones and no social media meant that the myth was based purely on word of mouth and first hand experience but by the end of 90s came the Internet revolution where tourists didn’t need holiday companies any more and the independent travelers came to the fore with Ibiza being one of the first destinations to see an influx of low cost carriers and cheap hotel beds costing a few hundred pesetas per night. 

The Internet explosion soon sent the message far & wide and the message was that Ibiza was a party paradise that you could enjoy for 3 months, would cost you very little in real terms and you could get by on doing a few odd jobs such as selling tickets or dragging people into bars. You also had the added bonus of having the chance to blag yourself into the top clubs and private parties and rub shoulders with a few A-list stars (and a few Z-listers as well). You certainly couldn’t do that at Maestros in Bradford or the MGM in Nottingham. What was not to like for a good looking 20 something with 3 months off in the summer? 

Fast forward and by the mid noughties there were 3000 (that’s THREE THOUSAND by the way) young people in San Antonio not doing much work but having a life-defining summer experience before settling down back home with a serious job. 

The term ‘worker’ was coined because these youngsters always intended to work even if the intent dwindled after a few days or weeks and it still makes me smile when someone introduces themselves as a ‘worker’ followed by ‘do you have any work’ – Don’t be too judgmental you just need to remember that it’s a collective term rather than an adjective. 

Numbers have dwindled a little over the last few years but there are still at least 1500 of them in San Antonio alone, you can usually identify them by their wristbands, tans (or lack of one) wearing of the latest fashions and taking themselves a bit too seriously. Asking for workers discount is obligatory as is the desire not to work too much but party to the max. They pack themselves into overpriced accommodation and live in tough conditions because every morning they wake up to the sunshine and the knowledge that there’s another amazing Ibiza party that day and/or night just waiting to be posted on Facebook. 

In worker terms the San Antonio worker is top of the worker food chain especially those who actually get a decent job whether it be dancing, PRing or selling tickets for one of the bars. If you don’t believe me then go to Benidorm or Magaluf and look at the workers over there. Wow! 

As much as the Ibiza snobs love to hate them for me the San An worker is a vital cog in the machine. They are their own micro economy with plenty of local business’s relying on them. They keep getting put down by exploitive employers yet the good ones bounce back and the weak ones return home to the comfort of their mums cooking. Lots of workers return to the island and knuckle down to a ‘proper’ summer job and those who don’t spread the Ibiza gospel far and wide via social media. As experiences go its right up their with the best time of your life, just ask Jamie Jones and Lily Allen.