If Ibiza SuperClubs were Football Clubs….

It's time for the European football season to start again as the Ibiza summer is in full swing, here's a fun blog about the similarities and blurred lines between two of my favourite topics.

Hï Ibiza: Manchester City

Rich owners who want overnight success and have spent serious money by signing the biggest names. High expectation on every level. Inherited home ground which has been fully reformed to a world class level with excellent neighbouring facilities. Lots of young fans that don't know any better

Es Paradis: Aston Villa

Once the best in Europe but have been on a slow decline for the last 25 years despite impressive home ground and support from a local area that craves success. Hampered by 2 clubs in the same vicinity and relies too heavily on local talent or veterans with no big name signings in the pipeline. Long way back to the top but not insurmountable with the right owners and investment.

Eden: Liverpool FC

Massive in the 80s. Former kings of Europe who have fallen down the pecking order but recent managerial change has people predicting success. Big local support especially amongst the working class. Future glory not too far away if recent major signings play to their potential.

Pacha: Manchester United

Proven pedigree since the 60s bringing with it a worldwide fan base. Could be accused of putting too much emphasis on merchandising and VIP seats although not afraid to flash the cash when a quality name becomes available. Were dominant until recent arrival of new money which has upped the competition. Wealthy owners will want to maximise their investment but will also be careful not to devalue the brand.

Ushuaïa: Chelsea FC

Mega-rich owners stay in the background and leave it to their bright young manager who plays to his strengths with his expensively assembled squad. Impressive home ground in a much sort after area with excellent facilities but pricey refreshments. Afternoon kick off specialists.

DC-10: Stoke City

Not the easiest ground to get to, right next to a busy main road. Doing it their way with no compromise and a no-nonsense manager who knows how to get his club firing on all cylinders. Only play twice a week as no real interest in mixing it with the European big boys. Some hard edged performances in front of a dedicated and loyal support. No massive names although the odd superstar can appear from time to time joining some young talent.

Lío: Arsenal FC

Talented young squad but eye-wateringly expensive to watch. Brand new home ground is a real wow and arguably the best venue in the area but can be uncomfortable for the traditionalists. Introduced new methods and changed the game in many ways but now others have copied so having to work harder to stay ahead. Older, wealthier crowd than their neighbours.

Privilege: FC Barcelona

Biggest Club in the world. Massive home ground but only full for the big occasions. Have brought through major talent over the years but some big names have failed to settle and have been moved on quickly. Big new signings most seasons but form can be up and down with the habit of relying on one major player.

Amnesia: Tottenham Hotspur

Vastly improved over the last 10 years, Varied squad with some big signings mixed with youth and the odd veteran. Known to take a punt and sign the odd prima donna but this home crowd love diversity and a drama. Knocking on the door to become the very best which was hard to believe a few years ago although they did achieve European success in the 80s which opened up the club to a whole new audience.

Sankeys: Leicester City

Finally mixing it with the big boys after years of mid table obscurity. One dimensional at times but plenty of heart and passion. Journeymen at other clubs seem to come alive in this arena although emerging superstars at risk of being stolen by moneybags big clubs. Inspirational leadership should ensure prolonged top flight status although a few blips can be expected.

More Noise Control for San Antonio (Rock Concert Not Included)

Noise Heat Map, West End, Rock Festival

The fallout from the 2016 noise study in San Antonio continues with the local government set to introduce more measures this week to control the decibels by setting up “Zones of Special Acoustic Protection”. 

In a warning to the West End and other high noise areas the council will set up a clear and defined process for the regular measurement of noise. If an area exceeds the legal limits by 15 decibels or more then the area will be designated for ‘special sound protection’ which will make it easier for the council to punish persistent offenders. 

The council has been in contact with municipalities in Mallorca and Valencia that have similar problems and have also contracted a company to take regular noise measurements during the summer which will also see if changes, such as the removal of terraces at midnight, are working.

The irony of this strict stance won’t be lost on those residents who were kept awake until 3am this past Friday and Saturday by a Rock Concert on Arenal Beach in San Antonio. The ‘Libertad de Sueños’ festival saw a massive stage erected on the sand and live music played until the early hours keeping many in the town awake. 

Most residents weren’t questioning the value of having a major concert in the heart of San An but nearly all decried the fact that it went on until 3am with some local bar owners saying it only highlights the double standards and hipocrisy of the current San Antonio town hall.

Balearic Sibling Rivalry

I’m currently staying at a friends place in Mallorca for a short vacation and loving every minute.  Don’t get me wrong Ibiza is, and always will be, my first love so I’m not being unfaithful but this trip has emphasised how things change in the tourism world. Let me explain.

15 to 20 years ago you could argue that the 4 inhabited Balearic Islands were all similar bucket and spade resorts for those of varying budgets. 70s, 80s and 90’s families only had to choose which one to visit every summer. As a kid my own family alternated between Ibiza and Mallorca.

Now in 2017 the 4 islands couldn’t be any more defined in style and profile. The western world has become wealthier and as tastes have changed so have the individial Balearic resorts to accommodate the paying tourist, reacting to market forces. Darwin’s theory of evolution is apparent for all to see, or as I prefer to say “The market dictates”. 

Playa den Bossa is a prime example. Little more than 10 years ago it was the main family resort in Ibiza with hotels specially designed around kids. Nowadays it’s a cosmopolitan mecca rivalling Las Vegas as the best adult-only resort in the world. 5 star hotels are opening all over the island: Hilton are now in Ibiza Town and Nobu are just finishing their luxury hotel in Talamanca with Robert De Niro rumoured to be doing the honours at the opening party on 30 June. Ibiza may be hippy at heart but there’s no prizes for guessing which direction it’s rapidly moving in.

Ibiza’s smaller sibling Formentera has always been more exclusive and now the local government has pushed through reforms that has made it more eco friendly, keeping with tradition but also making the place even more beautiful and seemingly untouched. Having the best beaches in the world obviously helps but the island is now near the top of the tourist food chain with prices at eye-watering levels but try getting a room in the summer, nearly impossible.

Menorca rivals Formentera for amazing beaches and is still regarded as a family destination. Also like the 4th Balearic island it’s flat so ideal for outdoor pursuits and is home to Menorca Cricket Club who play at arguably the most beautiful cricket ground in Spain  Everyone who visits is usually surprised by the island’s quiet beauty and many return. It’s debatable whether the Menorca government wants mass tourism as their infrastructure isn’t huge and they seem happy with their niche in the market so if it’s not broke then why fix it but you can’t help thinking they they may need a new PR company to fully realise their potential.

Mallorca is still top of the tree when it comes to mass market, popular tourism. It’s easy to see why the largest Balearic island holds so much appeal. It’s organised and confident, has great beaches, beautiful mountains and activities for families, couples, sports people and thrill-seekers alike. Even the much maligned Magaluf has more facilities than the other 3 islands put together and in Palma it has one of the most spectacular cities in Spain. Like Ibiza, Mallorca has been a victim of its own success but much of the 1400 square miles is still undeveloped, and if you head out to the more rural areas you can enjoy a far more traditional island escape.

The Siblings 

Ibiza: The noisy yet cool renegade, a new age hippy dressed in the latest expensive fashions. 

Formentera: The chic bohemian, a natural beauty who always looks the part. The star pupil who doesn’t need to shout loud. 

Menorca: The quiet thoughtful one that rarely lets you down. Dependable and humble, doesn’t like to boast.

Mallorca: The confident big brother you look up to and who sets the standards for all to follow. Often have to ask his permission before doing anything.

With these siblings there are no losers, only winners. 4 islands, 4 different flavours, 4 to choose from. The main winner is the hard working tourist who only has to select which beautiful island to visit. That’s sibling rivalry but not as we know it.

Note: it’s my ‘Man in San An’ 2nd anniversary. Thanks to all who follow, read and comment. 173 blog posts so far and counting. 

Peru Mule Returns to Ibiza but what about an Apology?

Pics: Daily Mail

Michaella McCollum, half of the infamous ‘Peru 2’ is back on the White Isle this week. We know this because it was plastered all over everyone’s favourite rag in a highly choreographed photograph ensemble most likely negotiated by her PR company. 

You may remember that Ms McCollum was arrested in Lima airport along with Melissa Reid, they were both subsequently found guilty of trying to smuggle several kilos of cocaine from South America to Europe and served time in a Peruvian prison. They aren’t the first gormless wannabe’s to think they are untouchable and they definitely won’t be the last but for Ibiza people this story was hard to swallow.

What was almost unforgivable is the tale they concocted to try and cover their tracks. Talk of mafia, guns, being ‘kidnapped’ and a notorious ‘cockney’ made Ibiza and more specifically San Antonio sound like an episode of a violent TV series. Those that live and work on the island listened to their story in disbelief especially those that knew the real one.

Ibiza has always had an edgy reputation but the pure fabrication put forward by the ‘Peru 2’ only served to put the fear of god into thousands of parents all over Europe as their children prepared to go on holiday to the hedonistic capital of the world. Their story played on all the usual stereotypes that people genuinely believe, that is until they actually take the time to come to the island and realise that it’s not at all like it’s depicted in the press. 

So Ms McCollum & Ms Reid without even realising it became the flag bearers for all the haters who enjoy doing the Island a disservice, this time only to cover up their own shortcomings.

Ms McCollum was young, naive and stupid and she has served her time. Everyone deserves a 2nd chance but you get the horrible feeling she is making a play for fame in our celebrity obsessed culture. To even give her the chance to make money out of her situation would be wrong in my opinion however it’s a twisted world we live in. 

Ms McCollum is now free to drink cocktails on the sunset strip but don’t expect us to be happy about it. The people of Ibiza deserve an official apology at the very least before we can even start to forgive.

Special Night Police to Patrol San Antonio

Busy summer
San Antonio Council has created a special team of police officers to patrol the busiest parts of the town at night during the busy summer months. 

The Special Summer Night Team or ‘ENEV’ will have 7 agents, 2 officers and a dog with a handler and will work on a shift system that allows 4 to patrol every night from 1 May to 30 September. These agents will be additional to the existing local police force. 

The team will operate from 9pm-6am from 1 May to 31 August then 10pm-6.30am in September. Their main job will be to enforce local laws with regards to coexistence, noise control, illegal street sellers, bar closing times and security. 

The creation of this new group is in direct response to the proposals made by residents and business groups whilst developing San Antonio’s new strategic plan. 

Source: Nou Diari